Sometime I think to myself am I ever going to find someone to be with for the rest of my life. I know I thought that I had that the first time around. But that didn't work out the way that I wanted it to. Since he couldn't stop listening to his daddy. If he did then we might be together today. Maybe God had other plans after all for us. Then again he just might not be done with me yet and he might have something else for me to learn. I just wish I knew what he had in mind for me. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life either. I know that I have family around and some friends. But it just seem like that I get left out of lot of things more then anyone know. I am so sick and tired of that happening or the last one to know something. I am not to sure why this has to happen to me more then anything else in my life for. But then again it don't help much that I am shy.
I just wish I knew where to go from here. It seem like that I have tryed just about everything that I can think of doing to finding someone. It just don't seem like it working any more. Like I said before in other blog that I have done most of the site that I been on just want your money and it just care that you don't have the money for it. They just need other way for you to see who is writing you or have something on there where they could put there email address or something that on it. But most of don't want that on there with out you paying for the site. Thats what I just don't get out of them. But I keep on looking on other site. It just don't seem that working for me either. Right I am at a point in life I just don't any more or just about to give up on everything. Till I hear that someone going to get married or just been to a Wedding or going to have a baby, and thats when I get to think am I going to have that again.
I am so tired of everything this days. I know that I shouldn't give up on looking for the right guy for me. Just seem like I should do that since nothing else is working out right for me any more. I know that God has hand in everything in my life but it just don't seem like it any more. I know that I shouldn't give up God any more. Thats one thing that I am not going to try and give up on him. I have to pray harder and see if he led me down the right road to that great guy. I am just so tired of waiting around. I know that I am still going on with my life doing things that I should be doing everyday. I just would like someone else beside my family to do that way too. Just don't know any more on anything.
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